by Kim Woodward

I often drive to Sacramento to see my son and daughter-in-law. They live about 45 miles away, mostly freeway driving, and the last half in urban traffic. So there are a lot of cars surrounding me, a lot of different drivers and vehicles.

Sometimes I am able to make the journey peacefully. Other times, I find myself getting tense, irritable, angry that other drivers are somehow not doing things right (my way). I have been noticing this for a long time, and I am mostly pretty careful with my actions, but even there I can behave aggressively and with subtle discourtesy if the tide of irritation rises enough.

So what is the difference between a peaceful drive and a decidedly unpeaceful one? Partly it is due to external circumstances of course. There is certainly a tendency to anxiety and anger when traffic is heavy, or when I encounter other drivers who are aggressive. Time is also a factor. When I feel I have plenty of time, I drive with a lot less anxiety. But why, then are there times with heavy traffic, crazy drivers and time constraints when I am calm and at peace in my body and mind? What is different?

I think the major difference has to do with right view. If I begin the trip with a view that the important thing is attaining a certain destination by a certain time, then other drivers, vehicles, traffic situations all become obstacles to overcome in order to reach my intended goal. If I begin a trip with the view that what is important is that I and others I encounter have a safe and peaceful journey, then there is true peace. I don’t feel my stomach knotting or my hands getting tense on the steering wheel, and of course don’t feel any need to behave discourteously to self or other.

And, I have to view myself into right action. I am never long term successful in acting myself into right view.

by Kim Woodward

Living in rural California and driving a lot, I continue to do a lot of my training on the road. This past month I was driving daily from our home to the barn where we keep our horses about 15 miles away. The route is a quiet two lane country road with very little traffic.

I noticed when driving out in the morning that I didn’t even identify myself as “car”. I was just driving. Then, when a car would appear in front of me or turn onto the road from a side road or driveway I would judge the driver in front of me. “He’s driving too slowly! Come on, come on, don’t take all day.” Or, if the car pulled away from me, “She’s driving too fast! Where does she think she’s going so fast! It occurred to me that I never met drivers that really drive “right”, i.e. the same speed as I do. (Of course, if there are such drivers, I never would meet them because I wouldn’t overtake them or they overtake me.) So, having noticed this judging in my mind, I started trying to eliminate it. Very difficult! As long as I saw them as “other car” I judged, no matter how much I tried not to. I was able to modify my actions. I didn’t tailgate, or race to catch up, but the judgement was still there.

Then, a couple of weeks ago, I was just driving… not fast, not slow… just driving. A car turned out in front of me that was going more slowly and I began to overtake it. And, another car appeared in my rear view mirror overtaking me. Suddenly I saw myself from the other drivers’ point of view. Sometimes I am the fast car. Sometimes I am the slow car. When I could see their judgements of me I found myself able to genuinely let go of judgements. I could go back to just driving.

Kim Woodward